How come I’m not famous yet?

July 14, 2006

Right. I need answers.

I have now written two blog entries.  Both featured no spelling mistakes, and were reasonably well punctuated.  Both were commented upon, and I’ve driven up the views to my flickr pages.

Even using the most stringent adherence to ITV’s guidelines, this qualifies me for a spot on Celebrity Love Island.  But so far, the phone has been silent.  Have I even been rung by the Guardian for a witty insight into private armies sequestered in Belize? No.  It can’t be that my unique stance — writing a blog as an insider to the IT industry — isn’t sufficiently novel, so there can only be one explanation; there’s something wrong with society.

There’s only so long l can let this sad state of affairs carry on. Unless I start seeing some serious improvement on behalf of the British public — I think it’s a good starting point if someone were to get up and offer me a seat on the train — then I’m going to have to consider writing a strong letter of complaint to the person in charge. Perhaps to Kofi Annan. Or — better still — David Hasselhoff. Now he’s a man who knows how to get things done.

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8 Responses to “How come I’m not famous yet?”

  1. Andy Lee Says:

    You were probably over looked for Love Island as you are to famous, I’ve heard of you but I’ve not heard of anyone who’s supposed to be on Love Island. ( I think 1 had a dad who a couple of people may have heard of 😉

    Note they dropped the Celebrity from the name, probably to reflect the fact they have dropped the pretence that they have any Celebs…

  2. Neil Says:

    Indeed, David “The Hoff” Hasselhoff is your man. Just in case there’s any doubts about his qualifications, take a look at his CV. Most impressive.
    http://neilbartlett.name/downloads/hoff.pdf

  3. Stu Says:

    When I Google you (is the verb “to Google” in the OED yet?), the first hit is The Cloud Appreciation Society – surely your fame will spread far and wide because of this association…

  4. Myrto Says:

    I think Frank is more famous than you…

  5. MushyMajor Says:

    The cloud appreciation society. Your rating on the nerdiness index is fast approaching the coveted übernerd. Surely a job on ‘Rough Science’ is only a matter of time.

    I shall only ratchet you down a notch to Mastergeek if you manage a mention on Guardian OBO today.

  6. Pete Shaw Says:

    I saw this excerpt: Say it lound, say it plowed from Modern Drunkard magazine and thought of you : )

    ‘Carefree Mumbling
    There are times when formulating actual words can be such a hassle. I mean, must we enunciate every damn syllable to get our point across? You’re doing all the work, let the listener pick up the slack for once. Relax your lips and tongue and let loose long musical streams of mangled vowels and consonants. After a while they’ll start getting it. You’ll know this because they’ll put on a strained half-smile and nod vaguely at everything you say, even if you tell them you’re thinking about throwing yourself off an overpass.

    If a listener is really lazy and asks you to repeat yourself, you have three options. 1.) Tell him to pull the corncobs out of his goddamn ears. 2.) Mumble louder. 3.) Wave him off and act supremely insulted for the rest of the evening.’

  7. LuiZ Says:

    You need cool T-Shirts to sell on your site!


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